2020 has been a giant pain, in more ways than one. What I've come to realize, as an empath (HSP), is that one of the symptoms of this crazy year is pain.
And I don't just mean physical pain.
I mean all kinds of pain.
Physical. Mental. Emotional. Energetic. Phantom. Empathic. The list goes on.
I've been feeling a lot of pain this year of 2020. I think we all have.
The voices of certain politicians (yes, plural...and yes, from both sides of the aisle) make me cringe every time I hear them. While last year, the sound of the tv droning in the background with various commentators never really bothered me, this year those same voices feel like fingernails down a chalkboard to my nervous system. It hurts. A lot. And while I can mute the volume, I cannot make the politicians and commentators stop talking.
I wake up many mornings with aches and creaks in my bones unlike anything I've ever felt before. It comes and goes, like phantom pain. Never enough to ask a doctor about. But enough to be annoying. Some days I feel like an arthritic old lady. Other days, I'm just fine.
Then there are pains that echo. The first (and only time) I watched the video of Chauvin kneeling on George Floyd's neck, my entire body writhed in unbearable pain. Now, every time I hear or say either of their names, or any of the other names of individuals who have died at the hands of injustice, I feel the same pain echo through all parts of my body. That pain runs deep. It's bone deep.
There's also the pain of covid...both the isolation, the heart-ache of missing loved ones, and the deeper ache of hearing stories of lost loved ones, and the quiet dull ache of loneliness that occasionally pangs with sharp shudders that make me gasp for air, which then causes a different kind of pain.
I could go on. I'm sure you could too. I invite you to share your pains in the comments.
What I've come to learn is that this year, this 2020, there is really nothing we can do to fix the pain, to stop the pain, the make it go away. Pain killers don't work for this kind of thing...and if they do...they will only cause a different kind of pain later.
Once upon a time, many years ago, I broke my pinky toe. I caught it on the leg of a coffee table. It was a doozy. I passed out. When I came to my senses again, I saw that it was bent at a 90 degree angle, pointing away from my other toe. I called a friend to drive me to the ER. The doctor gentle taped it to the next toe and said it would take 4-6 weeks to heal. He suggested I use a cane and skip the gym and the dog walking for awhile.
Essentially, he told me that the only thing I could do for it was keep it still and let time do its healing work. It wasn't pleasant, but he was right. Time healed that wound. (until I broke it again a decade later...and time healed it again then too).
Time will heal these pains too. A lot of things in our world are breaking and broken. And the only thing we can do is breathe through it and let time do its job.
And, I have learned that in small doses, like the eerie screech of a snowy owl, screaming helps.
So, occasionally, when I know the sound of my voice won't hurt anyone else's ears, I scream. There was a research study done once where participants were asked to hold their hands in ice cold water for as long as they could tolerate. Some were told to stay silent, and others were allowed to scream whatever swear words they wanted. Those who were allowed to swear were able to tolerate the cold longer. They analyzed the hormone levels and proved that screaming expletives does something within the nervous system to release the stress hormones and trigger the healing hormones.
Scream away. Cuss if you need. It helps.
For more on 2020 and all the energetics of this crazy year, join me next week for this one time live webinar. If you can't make it at that time, register anyway and you will get the replay link. You know you want to, it's only $10.